Re: Never Alone. (Shiori)

[Guest]

Leah placed the ticket down on the sink, vaguely hearing the words ‘light,’ and ‘park.’ She stared at her reflection for a moment before washing off her makeup, reapplying the mascara, and walking into her room again. She looked to the window, which was closed and empty of Eric’s figure now. Leah suddenly realized, with a painful tug at her heart, that she had no more tears to cry. She’d cried so much and for so long, she couldn’t cry anymore. And what scared her more than anything is that Eric thought she’d left him on purpose. Why do you think that that would make me love you any less!? he’d said.
“Because,” she murmured. “If I’d been taken, I would’ve forgotten.” She shook her head. “Forgotten everything. I’d be dead before a week was out.” Leah felt the cool trickle of a single tear, but no matter how much she felt like crying, her eyes wouldn’t let her. “Because,” she whispered again, “If I was taken, I wouldn’t have let myself live another week.”

[Spritz]

Retreiving his backpack, Eric popped a peice of gum into his mouth, ripping up the wrapper and leaving it on the sidewalk behind him. He shoved his hands deep into his pockets, and clenched his jaw, starting down the sidewalk to the park. He hoped Leah would come, for the sole purpose of getting away from her parents. But a small part of him made him realize that she might not come.

[Guest]

Leah shook her head, not wanting to pack anything. She’d known from the minute she’d laid eyes on the ticket that she would go, but it still bothered her to pack. Grabbing a small backpack from her closet, she packed her wallet (which she was glad to have regained access to) and a pair of white, rather ripped up, skinny jeans and three t-shirts, which she compacted into one bag, as well as some other necessities, like undergarments and her one thing of mascara. Sighing, Leah lifted the bag. It had to weigh less than a pound. She glanced at the clock beside her bed. It was forty-five minutes ‘till eleven. It’d take her fifteen minutes to reach the park, then they’d have to get to the train station. Sighing heavily, Leah grabbed the ticket from the bathroom and silently made her way downstairs and out the door, her family on the couch watching the Addam’s Family once more. A slight, unexpected pang of longing went through her. She wished she could have unconditional love. She had had that opportunity, but she’d squandered it completely.

[Spritz]

Shuffling through the his backpack, Eric sat on the bench, the bag in his lap. Shaking his head slightly, he counted the remaining money he had left, and cursed under his breath. It wasn't much, and wouldn't last them very long. His dark hair fell into his eyes, and he brushed it away, his face concentrated. Shirts and pants were accounted for, and he quickly made sure he had everything that was nececarry. Five bottles of water were shoved in the bottom of the bag, along with a bit of non perishable food.

[Guest]

Leah intentionally walked slowly, her feet feeling heavy with the anxiety of seeing Eric again. She saw his figure sitting on the bench casually, and she looked down at the flopping yellow ticket that was trying to escape her grasp. Sighing deeply, Leah walked over to him. “Hey,” she murmured, her heart longing just to kiss him again, but she knew that she shouldn’t. He wouldn’t believe she was being real about it. He would think she was just trying to seduce him back into love. But what he didn’t know was that she’d never tried to be seducing. She merely was in love—true love. And he didn’t seem to realize that she still was.

[Spritz]

Eric faintly heard footsteps on the sidewalk, and a releived smile crossed his lips, if only for a second. Stuffing the items back into the backpack, he folded up the shirts and soon zipped the bag. Looking up, his heart gave a powerful pang of hurt and longing, and he managed a slight smile. "I knew you would come. Did you get out ok?" It was a simple question really, but his words seemed strained, even if he hadn't meant them to be that way.

[Guest]

Leah looked up at him and shrugged, “They were watching the Addam’s Family.” Leah couldn’t help but suddenly wishing she’d had a family of her own. She shivered slightly and rubbed her arms, putting her jacket on. “I guess we should be getting out, shouldn’t we? Don’t want to miss the train…”

[Spritz]

Eric pushed himself off of the bench, slinging the pack over his shoulders. His black clothing made him nearly melt into the darkness, and he threw up his hood, hiding his face. Inside, he realized he was starting to go back to his old state. Though Leah was with him, it wasn't the same as it had been. Emo again... Or something of it. All of his clothes he had packed were black, and he wasn't about to change anything about him now. He ran his thumb over the white scars on his wrists, and inwardly remembered the feeling of the metal slicing through his skin... The numbing pain that had washed over him, the crimzen blood that fell to the floor...

[Guest]

Leah stared at him for a moment, concerned. He was fingering the scars on his wrists, and Leah put her hand on one of his gently, “Eric, that was the past,” she whispered, guessing easily what he was thinking, “You can’t go back to that now. Come on, let’s go.” Leah smiled reassuringly at him.

[ DX i'm failing sorry ]

[Spritz]

The pain now suddenly felt like it was... right. It felt good, it felt like it was needed, and inwardly he yearned to slice open his flesh once again. He hadn't noticed Leah step closer, and jumped as she placed her hand on his wrist, looking into his eyes. Breaking out of his trance, he set his jaw harshly and gave a stiff nod, showing that he wasn't all to certain about that. What was the harm? He stepped uneasily beside Leah, but shoved his hands deep into his pockets. His hood was hiding half of his face, and he clutched the train ticket in his fingers.

[Guest]

Leah walked alongside him in silence for a few more minutes, pondering these things. Abruptly she stopped. Leah pulled him closer to her gently and kissed him before whispering, “Eric, you may not believe me. Not after what I did—I don’t expect you to. I just want you to know that I’m sorry. But if…if I hurt you that badly,” Leah’s voice cracked slightly and her eyes started tearing up, “If I hurt you that badly, I don’t want to hurt you again. Not ever.” Leah let go of him and turned around, hiding the fact she had tears running down her cheeks. “I think it’d be best if you went alone. I know you won’t believe me when I tell you that I love you now. But I do. I haven’t loved anybody since Micah. You’re the only…” Leah sniffled slightly, “You’re the only guy that I’ve ever loved—or ever hurt—so much.” Leah let the ticket fall from her fingers. “I’m so, so sorry, Eric. I love you. I really do. And I’ll keep my promise. I’ll never forget us. I’ll never forget what we had.” With that, Leah started to walk away.

[Spritz]

It was obvious that Leah was thinking, and Eric shot a sideways glance at her face. Minutes passed in silence, before Leah stopped, making Eric trip over his feet as he almost bumped into her. Catching himself, he felt Leah pull her to him, and blinked once as she kissed him softly. The feeling wasn't the same. He wondered if it would ever be the same between them, and hoped it would be... someday. His eyes widened slightly as she started to speak, but he didn't say a single thing during her words. Tears were welling up in his eyes, and his heart was throbbing with each beat. When she turned away from him, he watched the ticket flutter to the ground. Bending down, he snatched it up and grabbed her hand, pulling her towards him. Opening her palm, he pressed the ticket back into it, then closed her fingers around it gently, all the while staring intently into her eyes.

[Guest]

Leah wasn’t expecting Eric to pull her back and press the ticket back into her hand—in fact, she hadn’t wanted it to happen. There were tears streaming down her face, and she was angry with herself, and unfairly angry at Eric for not understanding where she was coming from, “No, Eric!” Leah said, choking on tears. “I can’t hurt you again! I’m scared if I follow you…” Leah withdrew her hand from his and walked over to the nearest bench and slumped over in it, holding her head in her hands, tears spilling through the crevices in her fingers. “Just go,” she managed to murmur through her hands, “I can’t…I can’t h-hurt you a-again.”

[Spritz]

"I'm not going without you." Eric's voice was soft and calm, showing his patience with her. Shrugging slightly, he looked at her as she crumpled into a heap on the bench, her makeup leaving black trails down her cheeks. The ticket was crumpled lifelessly in her fingers, and he grasped her wrist with one hand, pulling it down so he could see her face. His face was a picture of peace, and he gave her a slight friendly smile. "Forget about it Leah... Come on." He slid his hands under her arms and lifted her into a standing position, before patting her on the back awkwardly.

[Guest]

Leah stared at him, her eyes scrutinizing him for any details on why he was so calm. She’d been So. Foolishly. Stupid. And now she hated herself. She hated Eric for making her go with him—but there was no way in heaven that she could say no to him now. Shaking her head, she just stared at him as he lifted her gently into a standing position, patting her back, which she could tell he felt awkwardly about. She hated herself. Why couldn’t he just leave her here so she could die of starvation or hypothermia? Leah was starting to begin to feel like that’s what she deserved. Wiping her eyes on the back of her hand until the makeup was gone from her face, she shook her head, “Eric…why? Why are you being so…I don’t know…kind?”

[Spritz]

Forgetting the sense of forboding that Eric was feeling, he sighed and brushed his hair out of his eyes. He needed a haircut, it was getting too long, and obscuring his vision slightly. Stepping forward, he brought Leah towards him and hugged her lightly, giving a faint shrug. "You need someone to care about you." Letting her go, he realized that yesterday, the hug would have been acompionied by a kiss, but he wasn't ready for that. "We have to go, or we'll miss the train."

[Guest]

Leah shook her head, not expecting the hug, either. He was full of the unexpected tonight, wasn’t he? She nodded and walked alongside him, but continued talking quietly, “But I don’t deserve it. I did the unthinkable. I ran away from you without so much as a goodbye. I feel wretched.” Leah shook her head, her case being serious now, and though she wanted to cry, she wouldn’t. It was not right. She wanted him to know how sorry she was, but when she thought about it, she felt like she was stressing it too much. With billions of other things she wished she could say, Leah pushed them down and fell silent.

[Spritz]

Eric glanced at Leah, as soon as she was finished speaking. He didn't want to talk about what she did. He didn't want to remember her note, or the feelings that had pulsed through him for hours afterwards. He didn't want to remember anything but the feelings he had felt for Leah, before all of this had happened. He shook his head, before shoving his hands into his pockets, his eyes trained on the sidewalk as he passed over it. "You dont deserve what?"

[Guest]

Leah didn’t look up. Was he feigning innocence and misunderstanding, or was he being realistic? After a moment’s thought, Leah replied, “I don’t deserve you. I don’t deserve your caring and kindness. You gave me so much, and I threw it back at your face without so much as a second thought.” Leah shook her head, “I thought I was doing the right thing…” she trailed off and sighed heavily. “I guess I thought wrong, huh.”

[Spritz]

Eric frowned, and shook his head. At that moment, he moved his hands to Leah's shoulders, and stopped walking, turning her around to face him. Her eyes were tired and red from crying, and faint black outlines were smeared around her eyes. "Leah, why do you tell yourself that? I'm a regular kid, who has too many issues to talk about. I'm a normal person, nothing makes me special. Replace me with someone else, I doubt it would matter to most people." He shook his head, not understanding.

[Guest]

Leah narrowed her eyes. “Eric, you don’t understand,” she said softly, moving to start walking again. “You are special. You deserve somebody who’s going to give you unconditional love and not do what I did.” Leah chuckled with disappointment in herself. “I didn’t do the right thing. And I see that now.” Leah frowned. “I wish I could go back and redo it all. I never would’ve left. I wish it was the same as before. But now I’m afraid I’ve ruined everything.”

[Spritz]

Eric shook his head, then dropped his hands from her shoulders. He turned and started to walk down the sidewalk again, throwing words over his shoulder and slamming his hands into his pockets. "I dont want to think about what happened in the past. I want to think about what is going to happen in the future. Makes everything better." He pursed his lips and continued to walk, before motioning with a finger for her to follow. "Come on."

[Guest]

Leah shook her head and decided it best to drop the topic. Despite everything she wanted to say, she kept her mouth shut. “All right, I’m coming,” Leah said softly before following him. At least, maybe, the train ride would consist of less talking, and she could fit in some sleep. Wherever they were going, she was hoping they could stake out a life. Either separate or together—preferably together. At least she’d be far away (hopefully) from this place full of desperate and longing memories that tugged on her heartstrings.

[Spritz]

Though Eric was still heart broken, he held out his hand for her to take. It wasn't that he didn't have feelings for her anymore, that was obvious, but it was more of a friendly gesture than that of a hopeless lovers. "Come on. I dont know where were going to go. I only have enough money for a few nights of stay, but... We'll see if we can find something else." He wasn't promising her that life would be easy, in fact he knew it wouldn't be from now on.

[Guest]

Leah took his hand gently, feeling rather awkward and out-of-place. She didn’t wanted to be near him anymore. She loved him dearly, yes, but she’d screwed things up. A lot. She nodded and commented, “I have some money, too. Couple hundred dollars… Most of it was from the neighbors who felt bad for me doing the chores all the time. I was originally saving up to at least attend school for a year.” Leah shrugged, “But I’m happy to spend it to help us get a move on in this world.”

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