GREAT BLOND JOKE LOL, NO OFFENCE TO YOU BLONDS OUT THERE!!

[Guest]

ALRIGHT a brunette and a blond were gonna see who can get to the bottom first, so the both jumped off of the building at the same time, wich one got to the bottom first?????!?!!?!?!?!?!


the brunette! the blond had to stop and ask for directions!!!!

[Saviour]

haha, that's funny,

have you heard the microwave blonde joke?

[Guest]

oh yeah thats hilarious

[Saviour]

yeah, my cousin is blonde and we make fun of her all the time, but she gets used to it, lol

[Guest]

What's the microwave joke? I may be blond myself, but I'm still a sucker for great blond jokes!

[Saviour]

haha,
so this blonde walks into an electronic store and sees a TV for sale, she says
"How much for this TV?"and the clerk says
"We don't sell to blondes"
So the blonde goes and dyes her hair brunette and goes back to the store and says"How much for this TV?"and the clerk says
"We don't sell to blondes"
so the blonde goes and gets a wig that's red and goes back to the store and asks"How much for this TV?"
And the clerk says"We don't sell to blondes"
"Why do you keep saying we don't sell to blondes when I'm not blonde?"She asks
"Because it's a microwave"The clerk says.

LOL huh?

[Guest]

Yeah! Did you hear the one about the cattle ranch? Or the one about the stranded blond, brunette, and redhead?

[Guest]

Oh you don't mean the one with the genie lamp? Lol! here's one, it's kinda wierd...

There's two blonds and a green head, and they're trying to impress this guy

So the guy goes up to the first blond and says: "How did you get your hair that way?"
She rubs her hand over her head "It's naatural!"

He goes up to the second blond and asks: "How did you get your hair that way?"
The reply is the same

Then he goes up to the green head and asks: "How did you get your hair that way?"
she mimics the blonds and says: "AACHOO! It's naatural!"

Wierd, huh?" It works best with sound affects and the motions.

[Guest]

... i dont get it! lol

[Guest]

the blonds stroke their hair back and say their hairstyle is natural. The greenhead sneezes and then does the same thing. It's a lot funnier when you tell it in person.

[Guest]

Well, here's another...

A blond and a brunette have a cattle ranch, but only with female cows. So the brunette goes to Texas with her life savings of $200 to get a male cow to breed with their females. After much haggling, a man agrees to sell her a great bull for $199. Feeling pleased with herself, the brunette goes to the telegram office to tell the blond to bring the trailer and pick them up. "Hello, I'd like to send a telegram." she says to the man in the office. "Sure," he says. "What do you want it to say?" The brunette says, "I have a bull. Come pick us up." The clerk types it out. "Ok, ma'am. That's 8 words, $8." "Oh." says the brunette. "I only have $1. Is it a dollar per word?" The clerk nods yes. "In that case...write comfortable." the brunette says. "It's none of my buisness, ma'am." says the clerk. "But why? How is your friend going to understand?" "Well," the brunette explains. "See, my friend is blond, and she reads so slow, all she'll see is COM-FOR-DA-BULL."

[Guest]

[Guest]

Here's another one my friend told me...

A blond, brunette, and redhead are all on a plane. Suddenly the plane starts to tip over. "Excuse me," says the pilot. "We are having some weight management difficulties. If you wouldn't mind dropping any heavy items out the window, it would help us tremendously." So the 3 passengers go through their suitcases. The redhead drops a knife out the window. The brunette drops a large rock. The blond drops a bomb. (How they ever got past security, I'll never know!) The plane still is too heavy, so the pilot makes an emergency landing into the wilderness below. The three girls decide to go on a hike and look for food. While scavenging, the trio come across a sad little boy. "Oh, why are you so sad?" asks the redhead. "*sniff, sniff* I had an ice sculpture, but a knife fell out of the sky and broke it." the kid responds. The redhead looks away guiltily. An hour later, they pass the boy again. He is even more sad. "Honey, what's wrong?" asks the brunette. "*sniff, sniff* I was building a fort, but a giant rock fell out of the sky and crushed it." says the boy. Several hours later, they find the boy again, but he's rolling on the ground laughing. "Why are you so happy?" asks the blond. "Well, *giggle, giggle* my mommy farted, and our house blew up!"

[Daydreamer]

hehe

[Guest]

ookay. Funny, but odd. I LIKE IT!

[Guest]

LOL those are good jokes.

[Guest]

Here's one. No blondes, but...

Jimmy and Tim are best friends who love to play baseball. They both always wonder if there's baseball in heaven, but they never find out. 50 years later, after Tim has died, Jimmy is woken in the middle of the night. He sees an outline of his friend Tim. "Tim..." he says cautiously." Is that you??" Tim says yes, that he's now an angel. "I have good news and bad news." Tim says. "Which news do you want first?" Jimmy selects the good news. "Well," Tims tells him." There is baseball in heaven!" Jimmy asks the bad news. "Weelll..." Tim drags it out. "You're up to bat next Tuesday."

LOL, right?

[Guest]

that's a good one.

[Guest]

[Guest]

I know, right?

[Guest]

Yes, it is very very funny. I would love to hear more ones you know...
(Hin hint, stay)

[Guest]

I love these 2



A guy decides to bring his new blonde girlfriend to a football game. After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game.

She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand."

"What did you not understand ?"

And the blonde says: "Well, at the begginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first. Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back. So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"





and







A brunette, a red-head and a blonde were in jail when they decided to break out. The girls broke out and the brunette said,

"Let's hide in that barn, they'll never find us."

So they climed up the ladder and then the blonde threw it down.

The next morning, the cops said, "Come out with your hands in the air!"

The red-head said, "Hide in those baskets, they'll never find us!"

So the Brunette got in the first one, the red-head got in the second one and the blonde got in the third one. Meanwhile, the cops were getting a ladder set up and trying to get up there. Once they got up, the seargent ordered them to kick the baskets.

So the cop kicked the first one: "RUFF."
"It's just a dang dog!" yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next one: "MEOW."
"It's just a dang cat," yelled the cop.
The cop kicked the next basket and the blonde yelled, "POTATOES!"

[Guest]

The first one's great.

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